Hello you lovely people
Thank you all for your great comments after my last post. I think I need to commit to blogging a bit more. Even if I feel I have nothing to say and it's just a one liner.
So the last few days were a bit better and the meh feeling has lifted a bit. I went out last night to a Diwali celebration with my Indian friend. It was fun and I even volunteered to get up on stage with others to learn some bollywood dancing...lolzzz
At one stage I was chatting to a lovely chinese/malay/australian girl (so multi ethnic are the Irish!) and I just really wanted to go home. Then I just said to myself 'hang on, one of the big pluses of not drinking is that you can actually engage with people, like properly, instead of just drunken chats. So I focussed myself on the conversation and ended up having a lovely chat about food. I actually really like talking to people About stuff. Part of me is pretty intolerant of other people in general but I'm going to really try some loving kindness action. It's only making me, and not anyone else, upset. So I think last night was a bit of a game changer for me, not sure yet in what way though.
They had some amazing dancers on stage and I did feel a little sad that I wasted my 20's and 30's wasted in one capacity or another. I wonder what I could have made of myself if I hadn't been such a drinker, and in younger year such a drug lover! Even using that phrase 'drug lover' in relation to myself seems so weird. I can't believe I used to do that shit. And it ruined me for a few years in my 20's.
Anyway, as some chinese wise dude said 'The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the next best time is now'
Off I go into the gale force winds and lashing rain to dig my hole!!
xxMtts
I love that Chinese proverb mtts! Great to hear you sounding chirpier! I'm starting to like parties again now that I'm seeing them as an opportunity to have a few really good conversations with people (old friends and new). Big hugs SM x
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a fun night!
ReplyDeleteI need to learn to listen and learn about people at parties, too!
Dancing is the best!
xo
Wendy
I was never a great partier, but I'm trying to make an effort. To dress up. Wear make up. Talk to people. Instead of curling up with wine and the TV. Feels a bit weird. Diwali sounds fun xxx
ReplyDeleteYes. Making the effort.
ReplyDeleteI got dressed up in a gown and went to a gala on moments notice this weekend. I was in my pjs, but I decided to suck it up and go.
I had a great time. And I reminded me that sometimes fun requires effort. I can't just sit at home and wait for it on my couch!
Once I get over the fact of not drinking I actually do enjoy nights out now. No worrying about having to pace myself, not drink too much, obsessing about the next drink, wanting to fall asleep, speaking shite, not remembering coming home etc etc ! Instead chatting to new people, enjoying the moment, being slimmer, getting into bed sober and getting up without a hangover next day! There's lots to be said for it ;-) Keep smiling xxx
ReplyDelete