Some Joyce and an update

“A few light taps upon the pane made him turn to the window. It had begun to snow again. He watched sleepily the flakes, silver and dark, falling obliquely against the lamplight. The time had come for him to set out on his journey westward. Yes, the newspapers were right: snow was general all over Ireland. It was falling on every part of the dark central plain, on the treeless hills, falling softly upon the Bog of Allen and, farther westward, softly falling into the dark mutinous Shannon waves. It was falling, too, upon every part of the lonely churchyard on the hill where Michael Furey lay buried. It lay thickly drifted on the crooked crosses and headstones, on the spears of the little gate, on the barren thorns. His soul swooned slowly as he heard the snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead.” 

- Joyce, The Dead.

 Isn't that beautiful? So evocative, and romantic? If you haven't read any Joyce, you might recognise from Fr Ted, where they parodied it! Gorgeous.

 Thank all of you who posted under my last post. It means so much to know that there are people out there in the same place as me and offering support. Maybe I do need to blog more, even when I'm feeling good, maybe that will help me stay more on an even keel. It's important to have people around who can understand what it's like being AF and who also understand why you had to make the decision in the first place. Sometimes I think that it's almost easier in society if you're a stereotypical alcoholic, then people understand that you have to stop drinking and why. When you're not such an obvious boozer comments like 'I don't know how you do it' and 'oh you weren't that bad were you?' are common and can be difficult to handle. Lots of times these people had gone home by the time the second bottle got opened or by the time you were crawling up the stairs at 4am.....There's also the misery of what goes on your head the next few days. Horrendous. 

Anway, I'm following Nadia Sawalha and her husband Mark Adderley on youtube on their How are you feeling - A daily diary of living with depression. It is amazing, Mark is a recovering alcoholic who hasn't drink in years, he also suffers from anxiety and depression (no surprises for alot of us boozers there!). He is incredibly open and honest about his life and I can really relate to alot of what he says. His comments before Christmas about how it was a really hard time not to drink with everyone in the pubs and there twinkly lights really helped me through Christmas. Have a look at it, it's great.

So my darlings, bit of a waffle there, not the best written but I wanted to put pen to paper and say hi. 

XXX

Mtts.